Monday, June 30, 2014

Why I Stopped Writing.

To some people writing is like breathing, impossible to stop doing. Well, hey there "those people" I
Yeah, hypocrite is too good for you.
used to be one of you. I loved writing. I did it nearly every day. I even wrote nearly 30,000 words in just a couple weeks one time just because I said I could. I also said I'd never let go of what I wanted from my life. I wanted to be an author. Well, ladies and gentlemen, let me introduce to you a hypocrite, BK Mattingly. Yeah, that's her on the right. The scoundrel.

For more than a year, my fingers never hit the keyboard or a notebook. I was "busy" sure, but the real reason I stopped was because I shoved away a story I didn't think was going anywhere. I was making progress, but the story was 6 years old and had seen more than 7 rewrites. I guess, I was shelving it, but instead of starting with something new, I shelved my entire dream of becoming an author. It was a decision I made without ever actually thinking about it. I just kept moving around and adding things to my life until I looked up a year later. And then, I freaked. I couldn't even figure out where I saved my WiP. 

While I was learning the art of hypocrisy, I also sporadically checked in with the bloggers I visited regularly and I've noticed something. Over time they've all all moved into three groups. 1) self-publishers, 2) agented-up (this is my version of cowboy up, but you know, with a literary agent instead of a bull) or nearly there sending out queries and seriously slamming the slush pile, or 3) dropped off the face of the Earth (This is where I lived, but it's not that great of a place.) I can tell you, of the three, number three is the worst place to be.  

I've learned a lot in the 2 years since I've regularly blogged, but mostly, I've missed the community of writers I found, the support and advice I had from those bloggers, and constant motivation to keep writing, keep improving, and never give up on the dream. Its time, I started contributing and got back to work on becoming one of those names on the best seller list. I can't say I'll blog every week, but that's my loose goal. Hopefully, you'll see me in some form every Monday. You will find me more often on Twitter @bk_mattingly, hopefully I'll see you around there, too. 

So, now I have a question for you. Have you ever given up the dream? If so, tell me why and if not...motivation advice?

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